October 11

After reading about Noah, a younger grandson surprised his grandmother by saying he knew the name of Noah’s wife.

“I don’t think the Bible tells us what her name was,” she said.

“Oh yes it does,” he insisted.

“It says that Noah found Grace in the eyes of the Lord.” (Stories & Jokes of Mormon Folks, p. 28)

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Another child confidently told his Primary class, “Noah’s wife was called Joan of Ark.” (Stories & Jokes of Mormon Folks, p. 28)

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After a prayer book of his wife, Deborah, had been stolen, Benjamin Franklin put the following notice in the Pennsylvania Gazette: “Taken out of a pew in the church some months since, a Common Prayer Book, bound in red, gilt, and letters D. F. on each cover. The person who took it is advised to open it and read the Eighth Commandment, and afterwards return it into the same pew again, upon which no further notice will be taken.” (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 108)

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Golden’s favorite Christmas story about himself went as follows:

On a snowy day two weeks before Christmas, he was crossing South Temple to the north door of ZCMI. He walked slowly to the middle of the ice-slick street.

A woman burst out of the north door of ZCMI with a pile of packages in her hands and no clear line of site.

She plowed right into Golden.

Packages flew everywhere. Golden was knocked down and the woman fell on top of him. Together they began to slide south towards the curb.

All the traffic stopped. Everyone stood entranced by this most unlikely scene.

They slid until they hit the curb. It was then the woman realized someone was beneath her. “Oh, Brother Kimball, it’s you! Speak to me! Are you all right?”

“It’s all right sister, but you’ll have to get off here. This is as far as I go.” He painfully croaked. (J. Golden Kimball Stories, p. 92-93)