October 4

George Albert Smith: You have done such fine teamwork during the day, brethren, you have collapsed sufficiently two or three times by moving closer together so that many people who were standing could have seats. I am going to ask if you will do that tonight, if you will all move to the center of the seats. And when I say move to the center, I do not mean just to go through the motion. I mean move. (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 59)

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Lemons.jpg

Once a flight attendant asked Spencer W. Kimball, “Would you like something to drink?”

“What do you have?” he asked,

“Coffee, tea, Coca-Cola.”

He shook his head, “Do you have any lemonade?”

“No,” she said, “But I could squeeze you a little.”

He recoiled in mock dismay, “Don’t you squeeze me!” (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 275)

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The prophet once asked Golden to take the new Deseret Sunday school president up to the Brigham City [Utah] conference. “His name is David O. McKay. He just got back from the Scottish mission.” Golden agreed to escort the nice, young fellow.

It was winter. They traveled all day and night by sled in the bitter cold. Finally, they arrived with an hour to spare before the meeting.

Golden thought he was going to die. He reasoned he needed a coffee---bad. So he innocently suggested they go over to the Idle Isle Restaurant for breakfast.

The aroma of hot coffee filled the little diner. When the waitress asked the two gentlemen what they’d like, Brother McKay said, “Some ham and eggs and two cups of hot chocolate, please.”

Golden excused himself and found the waitress who had taken their order. “Would you mind putting a little coffee in my hot chocolate, please,” he asked. She said that would be OK, they did it all the time up there.

The waitress came by a minute later with two steaming mugs and said, “Now, which one of you wanted coffee in your hot chocolate?”

Caught, Golden said, “Ah, hell, put it in both of them.”

Brother McKay laughed uncontrollably.

To Golden’s chagrin, young Brother McKay told everybody the story at the conference. And he kept on doing it every time he spoke.

“I wish he’d keep his damn mouth shut,” he reportedly groused. “Maybe Heber will release him and we won’t hear any more about him!” (J. Golden Kimball Stories, p. 78-79)