Joseph Fielding Smith: Our prayers are not for the purpose of telling [the Lord] how to run his business (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 195).
Golden attended a stake conference in the Cottonwood area. The first order of business was to set apart the new seventies. A chair was set up in front for this purpose.
It went without a hitch---until the last man. As the man sat, Uncle Golden leaned over to ask his name. He saw a cigar in the man’s inside suit pocket.
He thought this unusual for a new seventy, but went ahead. In setting him apart, he said, “By the power vested in me, I ordain you a seventy in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, cigar and all!”
The baffled murmur in the meetinghouse showed the crowd’s puzzlement. Kimball had the new seventy stand up and take the cigar out of his pocket and explain to all of them what it was doing there.
The man sheepishly told how on the previous Friday at his office somebody had come in and said, “I’m a new father!” passing put Cuban cigars to everyone. “I took one,” he said, “and put it in my upper left hand pocket and forgot about it. I only own one suit and I put it on to come to this meeting.” (J. Golden Kimball Stories, p. 80-81)