December 22

The second counselor in the bishopric stepped to the pulpit to conduct the meeting, and he said with a tired sigh, “I’ve been to Disneyland all week. If it’s the happiest place on earth, why am I so happy to be home.” (Mormon Mishaps and Mischief, by D.N. Giles and C.L. Beck, p. 71)

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In Primary, a young girl drew a picture of he family of Jesus. When the teacher asked who the fourth person in the picture was, her answer was, “This one is Jesus, this one is Mary, and this one is Joseph. The other one is a baby-sitter for when Mary and Joseph want to go out for the evening.” (Stories and Jokes of Mormon Folks, compiled by Bruce E. Dana, p. 66)

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Question: What do you get when you cross a fairy tale with a temple?

Answer: Happily forever after.

(Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 63)

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After the prayer book of his wife, Deborah, had been stolen, Benjamin Franklin put the following notice in the Pennsylvania Gazette: “Taken out of a pew in the church some months since, a Common Prayer Book, bound in red, gilt, and letters D.F. on each cover. The person who took it is advised to open it and read the Eighth Commandment, and afterwards return it into the same pew again; upon which no further notice will be taken.” (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 108)

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Mr. Cannon said that one time J. Golden Kimball was discussing the United Order in a sermon. He said, “Brothers and sisters, I believe in the United Order! I will throw all my debts in with you any time!” (The J. Golden Kimball Stories, by Eric A. Eliason, p. 97)

Mormon Life , p. 50

Mormon Life, p. 50