September 29

The car simply would not run. The mechanic who was called in lifted the hood, reached inside, gave a twist to a little mechanism---and all was well.

“What do I owe you?”

“One hundred and ten dollars,” said the mechanic.

“Good heavens,” said the car owner. “That seems like an awful lot for just twisting a little gadget. How do you itemize it?”

“Well,” said the mechanic, “ten dollars for twisting the little gadget. A hundred dollars for knowing which little gadget to twist.” (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 124).

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In Primary one day, Sister Hanson asked Rob, a young sports fanatic, “Who defeated the Nephites?”

Rob’s answer: “I dunno. If they don’t play the forty-niners, I don’t keep track of them.” (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 123).

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J. Golden Kimball.jpg

J. Golden had this to say about his fellow General Authorities. “I love them all. But I love some of them a hell a lot more than I do others.” (J. Golden Kimball Stories, p. 52).

J. Golden Kimball: “I have often been assigned to speak in St. George, but I am assigned to go there in either July or August. Heber (J, Grant) goes down in January or February, but that’s because he’s the prophet.” (J. Golden Kimball Stories, p. 54)

J. Golden Kimball: “I am not accustomed to speaking to audiences out of doors. I have always had them closed in where they could not get away,” (Best-Love Humor of the LDS People, p.245).