January 19

Who first introduced walking sticks?

Eve gave Adam a little Cain.

When was tennis first mentioned in the Bible?

When Joseph first served in Pharaoh’s court. (G-Rated Jokes and Other Rarities, by Alma Heaton, p. 24)

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A fellow seminary teacher had a good rebuttal to a student who said he didn’t like school and wished it were out. The teacher responded, “You should feel bad. I have to stay here until I am sixty-five!” (President Boyd K. Packer) (Stories and Jokes of Mormon Folks, compiled by Bruce E. Dana, p. 90)

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Methuselah was a great grandson of Adam and lived to be 969 years old, the oldest man ever. He was 369 when his grandson, Noah, was born. When he was 20 years old, if a son, Methuselah Jr., had been born, and then that son had a son at age 20, then every son from then on had a son at age 20, there would have been a Methuselah the 49th when he died. (Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 80)

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“I have made up my mind what we will call the baby,” a young mother announced to her husband. “We will call her Eulalia.”

The father didn’t like the name, and he quickly thought of a solution. “That’s fine,” he said. “The first girl I dated was named Eulalia, and it will bring back pleasant memories.”

The wife was silent for a moment and then she said, “Maybe we will call her Mary after my mother,” she said. (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 134)

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J. Golden went to visit the Saints in Gila Valley, Arizona. As the local Stake President showed him around, he noticed that Elder Kimball did not seem terribly impressed with what he saw.

“Why, Elder Kimball, Gila Valley isn’t so bad. All we need is more water, cooler weather, and some more good people, and we would have a right fine place indeed.”

J. Golden replied, “Sure. More water, cooler weather, and some more good people is all that hell would need to be a fine place!” (The J. Golden Kimball Stories, by Eric A. Eliason, p. 61)

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Mormon Life,  p. 16

Mormon Life, p. 16