January 3

If you fall, fall forward.

There has been a lot said about the value of exercise–some people get theirs by running down people, by side-stepping responsibility, by pushing luck, and by jumping to conclusions. (G-Rated Jokes and Other Rarities, by Alma Heaton, p.5)

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On Thanksgiving, a grandson heard his mother and grandmother talking about their family’s ancestors. Puzzled, he asked, “If we have ‘ansisters,’ do we have ‘anbrothers,’ too?” (Stories and Jokes of Mormon Folks, compiled by Bruce E. Dana, p. 72)

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You are probably a Latter-day Saint if:

Your meeting agendas seem to include songs, prayers, and refreshments.

You have clever ways to sneak whole wheat or beans into every meal.

You know the difference between “general authorities” and “authorities in general.” (Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 71)

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Someone said about her friend, a Ph. D. Candidate, “It seems to me that she’s learning more and more about less and less, and I’m really afraid that by the time she has her degree, she will know everything about nothing.” (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 123)

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The story is told that someone stopped Elder J. Golden Kimball on the street on one occasion. There had been a little difficulty in Elder Kimball’s family that had become publicly known, and whoever it was who stopped him, no doubt with a mind to injure, said, “Brother Kimball, I understand you are having some problems with one of your children.”

Elder Kimball replied, “Yes, and the Lord is having some problems with some of his, too.” (The J. Golden Kimball Stories, by Eric A. Eliason, p.125)

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So, You’re a Primary Teacher! , p. 76

So, You’re a Primary Teacher!, p. 76