March 14

A man had left the winter streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was to leave a day later and was planning to meet him there. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail to let her know he arrived. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly woman whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor. Her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife: Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

- Your Loving Husband

P.S. Sure is hot down here!

(MormonZone.com)

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The Young Women Presidency was discussing the temptations the young women were facing in their lives. One of the counselors said that whenever she was tempted, she remembered something her grandmother told her: “One sure way of keeping a teenage daughter out of hot water is to put some dirty dishes in it.” (Stories and Jokes of Mormon Folks, compiled by Bruce E. Dana, p. 135)

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Nephi’s mother when he was ten-year-old: “He collects everything made out of iron. I can’t get him to let go of any of it, especially the rod of iron.”

One of Alma’s best friends: “He has more faith than anyone I know. He will plant a seed almost anywhere.” (Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 108)

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Hugh B. Brown: The Lethbridge Stake comprises the whole of the north end of the world...I believe we have in our Stake the Ten Tribes. They are up here somewhere, although we haven’t found them yet. (Conference Report, April 1922, 106). (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 201)

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J. Golden Kimball, “The only way to live a long time is to get some incurable disease and then take care of yourself.” (The Golden Legacy, A Folk History of J. Golden Kimball, by Thomas E. Cheney, p. 90)

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Mission Moments , p. 37

Mission Moments, p. 37