April 25

George W. Bush, taking a walk in the park, noticed a man in a long, flowing robe with long white hair. The man had a staff in one hand and some stone tablets under the other arm.

George W., struck by the man¹s appearance, approached the man and asked, "Are you Moses?"

The man ignored George W. and looked the other way.

George W., unaccustomed to being ignored, positioned himself more directly in the man's view and asked again, "Are you Moses?"

The man continued to ignore him.

George W. then tugged at the man's sleeve and asked once again, "Are you Moses?"

The man finally responded in an irritated voice, "Yes I am."

George W. asked him why he ignored him, and the man replied, "The last time I spoke to a ‘Bush’ I ended up spending forty years wandering in the desert."

TheMormonZone.com

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After a doctor’s visit one day, instead of saying “good-bye,” a young boy’s doctor said to him, “Hasta la vista.”

The young boy, who didn’t understand Spanish, replied back, “Happy Easter to you, too!” (Stories and Jokes of Mormon Folks, compiled by Bruce E. Dana, p. 45)

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Pondering About the Millennium:

Will we ever need the forecasts of meteorologists?

Will we ever watch television?

Will there be a stock market? (Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 127)

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The story is told of William Lackaye, who was scheduled to speak late on the program at a banquet, at which all the speakers had been deathly long-winded. The chairman introduced Lackaye, saying, “William Lackaye will now give you his address.” Lackaye faced the haggard audience and said, “Mr. Chairman, Ladies and Gentlemen, my ‘address’ is the Lamb’s Club, New York.” He then sat down. He received a tremendous ovation. (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 254

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J. Golden Kimball: “There is no fault in the gospel of Christ. If lived up to, it makes you better; it makes you good in your home; it makes you good to your wife, and good to your children. It makes you good on the streets; it makes you honest; it makes you kind and generous. That is what the religion of Christ does. The Church is all right. I have got no ax to grind...If you can handle your own home, and mind your own business, you will have no time for fault-finding.” (J. Golden Kimball, His Sermons, December 1891-April 1938, edited by Bonnie Taylor, 145)

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