Famous Quotes of Elementary School Teachers (back in time):
To Thomas: “I am sorry you doubt that my answer is correct. I will have to prove it to you later.”
To Martin Harris: “Do you by chance know what happened to my lost workbooks?”
To Brigham Young: “Just because you are an excellent student doesn’t mean they are going to name a school after you.” (Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 27)
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Orson Hyde apparently had trouble with people misspelling and mispronouncing his name–particularly in England, where the custom was to drop the “H” at the beginning of a word. To clarify matters, Elder Hyde put the following notice in the Millennial Star:
“Persons procuring post-office orders to send us are requested to be particular in giving our name correctly. Some orders have come payable to ‘Horse and Hide’ some to “Horson Ide.’
Remember that my name is ORSON HYDE” (quoted in Taylor, Kingdom or Nothing, 121).
Jacob de Jager: A friend taught me a lot about ballooning...I also heard from my friend many delightful stories about previous balloon flights. On one occasion, clouds developed unexpectedly during a flight, and the two men in the wicker basket had not the faintest idea over which part of the country they were sailing.
They decided to lower the balloon, and they saw a Dutchman walking on a lonely country road. When they were able to draw his attention, one of the men in the basket shouted, “Where are we?” The lonely walker looked up, cupped his hands round his mouth, and shouted back, “You are in a balloon.”
To make their urgent request for direction more clear, the man in the balloon cried vigorously, “Where are you?” The man called back at the top of his voice, “I am on the ground.” (Ensign, May 1983), 75) (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 51)
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Sister Newton worked at the Hotel Utah and one day was assigned to take parking tolls in the ticket booth. At one point a limousine pulled through and the driver instructed her to lift the gate. “As soon as you pay the 10 cents,” she aid. The driver became impatient and informed her his passenger didn’t have to pay. Newton said she didn’t care if his passenger was the prophet, “10 cents,” she said, holding out her hand. Both heads turned at the sound of a window rolling down. President McKay told Newton she was a wonderful employee as he handed her a dime. She took the dime and said “thank you.” “What a wonderful man,” she thought. It wasn’t until the limousine departed that Nelson realized the prophet had just paid her. (Deseret News, Mormon Times, June 9, 2011, C6)
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J. Golden Kimball: “I met quite a prominent man on the street–that is where I generally have my conversations–and he was ‘digging’ at the Church. He was wondering why we do not have revelations. He was putting all those things up to me, so I said, “Look here, my friend, I want to be kindly with you. You haven’t got the same spirit and testimony that I have. This is The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. God is our Father...and Jesus Christ is His Son, the Redeemer of the world. I am willing for the Lord to run this Church, but I wouldn’t take a chance on it if you had anything to do with it.” (J. Golden Kimball, His Sermons, December 1891-April 1938, edited by Bonnie Taylor, 300)
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