You probably are or have been a missionary if:
You have eaten whatever that was three times this week.
You are not sure what your girlfriend looks like any more.
You are 20 years old and, it has been months since you went to bed after 11 p.m.
(Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 32)
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A gala crowd gathered for the test run of Robert Fulton’s outlandish steamboat contraption The Clermont. For hours the strange craft belched smoke and sparks from it tall, thin stack as the engineers attempted to get up the necessary head of steam. When the time to cast off had come, and the engines were being limbered up, the boat vibrated violently and made a loud racket.
A group of doubting Thomases in the crowd had been shouting loudly and scornfully, ‘She’ll never start! She’ll never start!” But the boat pulled itself together and started to move up the river. After a moment of astonished silence, the voices of the scoffers resumed their shouts, this time crying with all the scorn they could muster, “She’ll never stop! She’ll never stop!”
Isn’t that the way some people are? They change their position depending on the circumstance!
A church member who was lying in the hospital waiting for surgery was visited by Elder J. Golden Kimball. This is the record written of the visit: “The day before the dreadful ordeal, a mutual friend brought Brother J. Golden Kimball to administer to me. First, he talked and visited and then he blessed me. There was nothing frivolous about his conversation, and yet he soon had me smiling. Later, the smiles were interspersed with laughter. I began to see things in proper perspective and to realize that all was well with the world and that the sky for me, afer all, had but one dark cloud in it which, probably, would soon roll away. I felt I was in the presence of a sane, well-balanced man, and a man of exceptionally strong faith. In truth, never did I feel the power of faith more than that day.” (Richards, J. Golden Kimball, 102)(Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 87)
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J. Golden Kimball: We must be reaching, climbing, towering and trying to prepare ourselves for the great events of life. There is always some chances to be taken, and it is expected that mistakes will be made, and that we will change our opinions and correct our mistakes. The following story conveys this idea: One of our Bishops in early days was accustomed to floating logs down the Mississippi River. Occasionally one would break loose and find its way into a whirlpool, and it would go round and round until it was wasted away. The log was traveling all the time, but it was left behind and made no progress...some young people are merely traveling in a circle and are not cultivating the talent the Lord has given them..if we undertake to impede the progress of this work, we will be ground to powder. (J. Golden Kimball, His Sermons, December 1891-April 1938, edited by Bonnie Taylor, 46)
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