You are probably a Latter-day Saint if:
Your New Year’s resolutions involve family history or food storage.
On the way to church Sunday mornings, some of your family is still getting dressed in the car.
No matter where you go for entertainment, you always buy a family pass.
You wonder if you will ever live in Jackson County, Missouri. (Latter-day Saint Wit and Wisdom, by David J. Brown, p. 23)
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President George Albert Smith visited New York Governor Charles Whitman and presented him with a Book of Mormon; then later he visited the governor again during the time of World War I. “The conversation,” President Smith later related, “turned to the War, and the Governor was happily surprised at the number of LDS boys that I told him were in the service.” The Governor then asked President Smith, “But, how do you think this war will come out?”
“Don’t you know, Governor?” President Smith asked.
“No,” said the Governor. “I don’t know who is going to win it.”
“Well,” said President Smith, “where is your Book of Mormon?”
When he handed him the book, President Smith read, “There shall be no kings upon this land...I, the Lord, the God of heaven, will be their king.” President Smith then explained that as long as the people of the United States of America keep the commandments, they will have the Lord’s protection.
“I had not seen that,” said the Governor.
President Smith replied, “You are not doing a very good job reading your Book of Mormon.” (Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People, p. 29)
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J. Golden Kimball: “When I was about thirteen years of age, when my father, Heber C. Kimball, sent word for me and my brother, Joseph, to come to his office. When we arrived there, he said to us, ‘If you want your father’s blessing, you be at the endowment house in the morning and you will get your endowments.’ Of course, we were frightened nearly to death. I do not know how people feel when they are going to be executed, but that is the sort of feeling I had, not knowing and having no conception of what it all meant. However, we were there, and we had our endowments. I did not remember much of that which transpired, but I was awed, and the impression was burned into my soul of the sacredness of that place, and the sacredness of the covenants which I had entered into almost as a child. When I was fifteen years old, our father passed away, and we were left, as many children are left, to wander and fight our battles as best we could.” (J. Golden Kimball, His Sermons, December 1891-April 1938, edited by Bonnie Taylor, 269)
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